I explained the good of the 2011 and the bad of 2011, and now i’m going to get to the ugly.
*Cue in the theme to The Good, The Bad and the Ugly!*
Seriously, though, 2011 was filled with some moments that made me scratch my head so hard my scalp constantly was bleeding. Some of them ranged from funnier moments of 2011 to moments that just flat out infuriated me. So here goes.
#1. Lulu
I went on an epic rant about this around the time this was released back in October, and I still can’t get the horrid taste of Lulu out of my mouth! For both Metallica and Lou Reed, this was the ultimate way to fuck with their fans, even if they had been fucking with their fans for years now.
#2. Born This Way
Yeah, fuck Lady Gaga. “Born This Way” is a direct ripoff of “Express Yourself” with a pretentious video that makes “November Rain” look like “Bastards of Young,” and now she’s bigger than ever. To the record buying masses: She is not unique. She’s not doing anything that Grace Jones or Siouxie Sioux did already. Her songs are mostly disposable Top 40 horseshit, and she’s laughing all the way to the bank.
And this song is a gay pride anthem! I have nothing but support for the homosexual community. I have donated money to a few LGBT causes, signed petitions for the legalization of gay marriages and I have a few gay friends, but I think the Westboro Baptist Church’s parody of “Poker Face” would be a better gay pride song than this sack of horseshit.
Oh, I’m sorry. That was a bit too harsh.
"This is so deep! Bjork so ripped her off!"
#3. Zoo Kid changing his name to King Krule
I dig Archy Marshall’s music, and “Out Getting Ribs” is one of the most real singles I’ve heard in the past 10 years. But he recently changed his moniker from Zoo Kid to King Krule. Nothing necessarily wrong with that, except that I really liked the name Zoo Kid, and King Krule sounds like a huge donut. Maybe Divine was eating a King Krule in Female Trouble
“Out Getting Ribs”
#4. Foo Fighters v. The Westboro Baptist Church
Speaking of the Westboro Baptist Church…
The Foo Fighters somehow pissed them off, which really isn’t hard, prompting the clan of probably inbred brainwashed Calvinists to protest their show in Kansas City, MO. However, in probably the coolest move ever, the band came out to counterprotest. Only they dressed up like truckers and played the country parody song “Keep It Clean,” much to the delight of their fans and the confusion of the WBC. A “WTF” moment that had you laughing the way you do when a friend pulls a prank, or if someone surprises you.
In short, Dave Grohl is the coolest motherfucker alive.
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